One day, I was playing; playing amongst the garden life, under the dappled shades of watchful trees, trailing a squirrel or a hopping sparrow, or even sitting; thoughtful, against the old bark, contemplating pleasantly the shapes of the clouds in the bright blue sky above me.
Sometimes, I would walk over the lawn, the dry grass crinkling under my bare feet, brown and wiry, jutting out of the ground like wrinkled old men, bent and furious, whispering of no tomorrow, of a sun that would never rise, of doom.
I laugh at their silly muttering, feeling as light and carefree as a fairy; happy, as I felt my days stretch far away, like one long golden road, spent in the garden that I loved.
I splashed in the waters of a cool brook, gurgling deep over the stones, the bubbles tickling my toes. It could be fish, bright, glittering nuggets of color, dashing across the pebbly bottom, as I walked, chasing them lazily with my oversized feet.

- S.R

Sometimes, you get this intense feeling to be by yourself, that for once, the people around you would let you alone… yeah I know that feeling, one friend cuts in. I love it when my whole family is snoozing in the afternoons and I’ m up all alone, walking through the house…it’s so peaceful. I don’t like being alone, another says, eyeing me balefully, I’d rather always be with someone. Well I know what each of you are saying, I think, but what I’m trying to express is not like that. It’s nothing like that.
It’s not turning yourself into a recluse, keeping away from your living, breathing companions. It’s walking out into the wilderness, away from civilization and breathing, the first real breath that you have taken for ages, in your own skin.
Sometimes you just want to scream ‘Cos you’re going nuts here, day in and day out, the same slogging repetition, when you know you have to be out there doing what you were meant to do, doing what you have to. That warm as it maybe in this clearing, with the fire roaring, and friends and family doting around you, you know that you have to get up and leave at some point ‘Cos there is a jungle path out there that no one has traversed before, waiting for your bladed arm to cut down the thick, stifling branches, leaving a trail in your wake for others to follow, if they want to or not.
I think I am meandering away from the topic. I was talking about wanting to be alone, away from people. Not lonely-alone. No; more like I- value- my- own- space alone. To you know, assert my own identity. To start being my self? Something like that, but not exactly that either…
Sometimes it feels like I’m biding my time. For..? I have no idea. Just that one day, all that is collecting beneath the surface will culminate and merge into a tiny dot and then explode, catapulting me like a cannon to God knows what.